What You’ve Allowed Yourself See.
January 7, 2024, 3:30 AM.
I stood in front of the mirror after judiciously sectioning, applying the leave-in conditioner, and twisting my hair to trim the ends. While doing that, I was devising ways to get something satisfying this year as regards my hair. Mentally, I had carefully come up with routines and regimens to stay true to, to have something acknowledgment-worthy. “I am going all out,” I said to myself.
Midway massaging in the hair butter and other self-made mixtures, I heard, “What exactly is it you don’t love about your hair?”
Honestly, I think I must have rolled my eyes and screamed it out loud to Him, “The LENGTH!”
Right after I said that, I got hit. All my life, I’ve tied, defined, and measured growing and healthy hair solely by its length. This I do believe got heavily influenced by the vlogs and blogs of naturalists I have followed and allowed myself to feed on. I never truly saw my hair in its real state — short yet not-so-short, spongy, lush, shiny, soft, black, and thick.
Because He was not done with just revealing that truth, He went further to give vivid pictures of how undeserving I am of what I own.
I realized I haven’t been true to myself.
My hair has survived on hard water, regular bathing soaps, expired shampoos, days of no conditioning, meager products, little to almost no styling every year, and my consistent washing and trimming of the ends—unlike most online naturalists whose cabinets are covered with every natural products and equipment they can lay hands on.
As if the bitter truth wasn’t enough, He reminded me of intervals when I received praise for how healthy, shiny, and black my hair looked whenever I styled it. Consecutively, I dismissed those compliments because I never thought it spelled H-E-A-L-T-H-Y. The countless times I contemplated and spoke grudgingly about shaving it off for regrowth, saved only by friends who strongly opposed it.
After hitting me hard with this revelation, He said, “Objective or Subjective, Goodie”
It is a New Year, everyone’s belt is tied and head bent to scribbling out goals and vision boards. No one wants to be mediocre about anything. Besides, every Nigerian (old and young) is chanting the anthem 2024 got welcomed with, ‘No gree for anybody!’
The atmosphere is heavy with the dedication to do new things, smash goals, birth ideas, hit the creative 100% scale, collaborate, leverage relationships, increase net worth, skill-up, purchase new gadgets, and most of all, get acknowledgment-worthy achievements either by self or people. Whatever way it will be, society’s measurement of absolute satisfaction and true achievement still remains objective-based results— What you and everyone can see with their eyes, and not the subjective-based results — What you’ll likely not see till you consciously assess yourself.
Although the subjective not pronounced could come in the forms of — change in habits, the little sprinkle of 1% intentionality that births discipline and commitment into whatever, the plot twist of a non-reader trying to read at least a chapter or two, the intentional kindness shown to people or the new tale of a renowned one-time prayerless individual transcending into a prayer warrior. The watered-down subjective-based results tells the real story of GROWTH. It holds more than the objective because it isn’t thriving to be measured by people’s lens — daily it keeps kicking against all odds to stay refined, to survive, build stamina, and most importantly, fight against the not-so-good to lock in/retain the good.
This year, as you intentionally hunger and work towards becoming better, choose to see the momentum you’ll gain through the lens of the Holy Spirit and not solely on how it is being measured. Take your everyday living as an opportunity to enjoy the process and do good, and not merely get buried in achieving acknowledgment-worthy objectives.
I do hope you’ll get to look inward to realize that you aren’t the stagnant YOU you’ve tagged yourself to be rather you are the YOU who is growing at a good pace regardless of the situations roundabout you.
We are just a week into the year, so, my salutation to you remains the same.
Happy Aligned New Year,
Your Friend, Goodie.
